Sears Shmears-Not-So-Easy Exchange Card

Don't let them give you an "Easy Exchange Card" when you return an item without a receipt. Get a Gift Card (in lieu of a refund or credit card credit) if you want to purchase something that can only be had on-line. I learned the hard way when I returned some clothing and wanted to buy a kitchen scale.

They had none in the store and a marginally helpful sales associate (that's what they call cashiers these days) found it on their website. It was only sold on-line. She said I could use my so-called Easy Exchange Card to pay for the on-line purchase.

No such luck. Upon checking out I hit a wall and had to call the number on the back of the card. The receipt number the machine asked for could not be found. I tried 3 times. I spoke to a customer frustration representative who told me the awful truth. I had to go back to a store (what a horror) to purchase a Gift Card with my Easy Exchange Card. Then I could make my purchase on-line.

Why, why, why is there even a difference????? Aside from the stupid (yes, I said "stupid") cashier that kept telling me not to get mad, I'm confronted with some byzantine corporate hooey that makes me almost disinclined to go back in that store. But I want my due. I spent the money and I want something for it. Maybe I should send them a bill for the gas I have to waste because some pencil pushers have worked out a way to frustrate you into leaving your money with them and walking out with nothing in your hands.

Don't let them snow you. Get the Gift Card.

Banana Republic's Fluid Pricing

I found a beautiful dress at Banana Republic, tried it on and bought it. It must have shrunk in my closet because when I put it on for a party it was too tight. No problem, this ranting shopper has plenty of dresses.

When I went back to exchange it for a larger size, there were none left, but I found out that it had since been marked down. The salesman kindly searched the area for the right size and found it at a location no more than 50 miles from my home. As I gave the salesman at the other location my account information to have it sent to me we confirmed the price. Quel suprise, it was marked at the higher price. The only way to get the lower price was to return to the original location with the receipt once the dress arrived and get a price adjustment.

WHAT UP WITH THAT???!!!

Now it seems that this national chain prices according to the median income of the surrounding area. Kind of like the insurance companies redlining according to neighborhood. Not right!!!!!

Commercials I HATE and Why

Not my usual subject for a rant, but shopping and advertising go hand in hand.

Verizon FIOS

The smug verizon guy and the fat cable guy spar, but I can't get verizon DSL, much less FIOS, since they're spending all their money advertising. Why not throw it into actually building a network that reaches me in a densely populated somewhat affluent city neighborhood.

GEICO

That stupid wad of money with stuffed toy eyes is the least of offensive elements. The woman flirting with it in a Chinese restaurant, the swishy guy lost on a country road are stupid characters in badly produced commercials.

More to come

Itchy Neck Labels

How many shirts, t-shirts, sweaters and tops have you ruined trying to get that itchy label out? I'm one of those princesses who can't stand those things touching the back of my neck. It seems that the cheaper the garment the stronger and more indestructible the thread they use to sew in their faux designer label. Gap, Banana Republic and Talbot's are some of the worst offenders in my closet. If you know anything about sewing, they backstitch several times on the ends to make sure the stitch doesn't unravel. I've poked holes in at least 3 sweaters with my very precise seam ripper trying to find a way into the label stitches.

Let these manufacturers know that the discomfort far out-weighs the cachet of wearing their label. I know what I'm wearing and I don't care if other people do. All of my really good things have labels that were sewn in with a very light stitch.

Clothing manufacturers, GET OVER YOURSELVES!!! Comfort trumps arrogance!!!!

CitiScam

What a shock when I opened my credit card bill to find that the interest charged was twice what it had been the previous month.  Then I noticed that the rate had doubled from 8.49% to 16.99%.  After I picked myself up off the floor and breathed into a paper bag I called and initially spoke with a decidedly eastern person.

The first thing you do when confronted with a customer service person is ask to speak with a supervisor.  It saves the time it takes to tell your story twice.  You have to ask a couple of times, after the first CSR tries to get you to accept the first offer, i.e., prime plus 10.99%, or the second offer of prime plus 6.99%.  

It helps if you have a great credit score and payment history.  Don't cancel the card.  No matter what.  If you do it will decrease your available credit and affect your credit score, which will affect the interest you are charged on all your cards.  Tell them you don't want to reject the increase, just that you want them to fix their "mistake."

Once you get to the next person, reiterate your virtues as a good customer.  Ultimately I was offered prime plus 4.99%.  Jumped on that and then asked for a refund of the usurious interest charged on the current bill.  Got that too.

Persevere.  Ask for someone who can say "YES."

Computer Help????

I just spent the better part of an hour on the phone with (unpronouncable) trying to get help for a friend's Linsys USB thingy.  I'm no xenophobe, but if I can't understand them, how can they help? The accent was too thick to wade through.   The time I spent repeatedly saying "I'm sorry, but I can't understand you," could have been spent helping other people.

In the end he was as exasperated with me as I was with him, but he still had to rattle off scripted drivel.  Even had to ask me to rate his service.  What was I going to say, "You suck!???"

Of course I gave him a 5.  But in all honesty outsourcing isn't the way to go.  

Salvo Auto

I can't believe that the cliche is true, but I just saw it.  A clerk who can barely enunciate words is able to multitask.  I went in to return the product that was erroneously recommended (at least I thought that's what the cretin behind the counter grunted at me).  While on the phone, another cretin grunted at me, but I wasn't sure.  He was mumbling into the phone the entire time I stood in front of him as he conducted the transaction.

Don't they train these people in basic customer service?  Is there a manager or just a zoo keeper?  Maybe if the stores paid more than minimum wage or provided an incentive program, employees would make an effort and customers will return.

 I won't go back.  I'll drive several miles out of my way, assuming my car is running after I put the wrong stuff in the wrong place. 

It's Always on Sale

Even if you paid full- or first sale price, you can usually get the lower price offered later on if you take in your receipt and ask for the adjustment. Most chains will be happy to oblige as long as your purchase was within a reasonable amount of time.  Usually the return window.

For example, I bought a pair of pants from a national chain from their on-line site.  I went into the local brick an mortar a week later and saw that they had been reduced.  I asked for the reduction and the clerk cheerfully obliged by crediting my card.

The lesson here; carry your recent receipts with you just in case you see one of your item reduced.  It couldn't hurt!

Happy Shopping

Welcome, All You Frustrated Shoppers

Greetings for the new year and wishes for satisfying shopping experiences.  As a professional shopper I have encountered all manner of frustrating, infuriating customer service and major retail corporate policy.  I want to share my experiences with you all and help you find a way to tell the offending companies that you are not happy.  Sometimes I can even tell you how I found my way around the problem.

In many cases, the trouble is isolated to one or two bad employees.  Then there the idiotic corporate drones with no imagination who don't care about your particular problem.  Or it's just one location of a chain store with a lackadaisical manager and slovenly employees.

Here are some offenses (in no particular order) that get me nuts:

• Gum chewing (cracking) by cashiers, especially if you have a lot of items
• Sending you off (anywhere) when you ask for a particular item, just to get you out of their hair. 
• One open cash register out of 10 closed lanes with a line to the back of the store
• Not being acknowledged when I approach a customer service desk.  It wouldn't hurt to nod in my direction, even if you are on the phone with your best friend.
• Only one of the double doors open so that invariably I try to go through the wrong one and get stopped short.  If you have two doors, keep them both open.

There will be solutions and tips to make your shopping forays more pleasant, economical and time efficient.

I know I'm not alone.  If you have an experience that may amaze, amuse or awe the rest of us, I'd love to know about it.

Let the ranting begin!!!